One of my dad’s favorite expressions fits oh-so-well with snow days. This being my first year of life with a child in public school, I have already been indoctrinated on every holiday that must be celebrated by closing school, plus the constant “teacher work days”, “teacher inservice” and “teacher really needs a break from your bratty kids day” (that one I actually agree with). Since the bulk of my youth was spent in Traverse City, the land of snow and gray skies, I associate snow days with pure, unadulterated joy. Primarily because snow days in Northern Michigan are R-A-R-E.
Now, though - not so much. It is now Tuesday evening and tomorrow is yet another day the school will be closed “due to inclement weather”. Mentioning again at the risk of being annoying that I am from Traverse City, the land where a snow day was NEVER called unless people were literally dying in their cars, buried alive in the 20 feet of snow that fell in a 2 hour period of time, combined with temps of -20 below, I have little tolerance for what snow days in Virginia mean. The roads are clear and dry, but there’s a chance that some side road might have some crusty white stuff on it and someone might slip. OH MY GOD CANCEL SCHOOL.
Yeah, I’m bitter.
Which leads me to my analogy. My dad has a saying. In this case, it goes something like this. “Snow days are like boobs. One is not enough, and three is way too many.” The original phrase inserts the word “Stinger” for “Snow Day”, one of his favorite drinks that my mom swears makes him “mean”.
Three is way too many. The kids are cuckoo, there are no movies out they haven’t seen, we’re all tired of playing the snow, I spent $268 at the vet today so the expendable cash is a little low, and, according to my mom, too much tv causes asthma in kids. Is that a wheeze I hear from upstairs? I think it is. God help me, they’ll probably cancel school on Thursday if all the snow doesn’t melt tomorrow. Someone send me alcohol, and fast. Someone also send me a rapid-acting inhaler for my children, because that asthma is a-comin’.
More pictures are up on the March 2009 Snowstorm Extravaganza.
