Arden started swim lessons last week and continued them this week with me. As I climbed into the pool with a trembling 19-month old child, I waited for her to start screaming. It didn’t take long. While the other parents happily played Ring Around the Rosy and Humpty Dumpty on the Wall, Arden screamed, kicked, fought me, and flailed. I immediately became the bubonic plague during Puking Water and Snot Round 1. Round 2 and 3 just put me over the edge. I had to get her into this “elbow hold” where you pin their arms next to their body with your hands holding their arms together near the elbow. In theory, it’s supposed to give you “control” so that you can pull your baby through the water, flip her on her back, or help her swim without grabbing you. In reality, Arden nearly kicked my ass, she was so strong. It took every ounce of my strength and willpower to keep her in the hold and continue on with the class. Every time we made eye contact, she looked like a caged animal, terrorized and beyond fear. The only thing she seemed to enjoy was floating on her back, the one thing that the teacher told us she wouldn’t like. She nearly fell asleep when I had her on back. She was entirely exhausted.
She’s one of the older children in the class which just made me feel guilty. I should have put her in the class last year. The 9 month olds are doing better than she is - they adapt to the water more quickly, learn the hold their breath more quickly, and don’t have near the amount of fear that Arden does. It’s the perfect age to start, apparently. I must have missed the book on that one.
It was one of those agonizing periods where as a mother you realize that you must perservere, even against the wishes of your child, because you know it’s better for them if you do. The instant gratification (and instinct, I might add), is to immediately remove your child from whatever situation is traumatizing them, wrap them in your arms, and comfort them. In a way, this class is more for the parents than the children. Nothing is harder than seeing fear in your baby’s eyes and firmly saying “1,2,3, you’re going under the water now . . . ” while pushing her squirming body under the water for the count of 5. It’s totally unnatural and a little more than stressful.
HOWEVER. We spent a lot of time at the pool since Friday, and Arden is over her fear of the water, and is actually enjoying the baby pool and not wanting to get out. She seems better when she falls down or gets a mouthful of water, and she was retrieving toys off the bottom. Mike took her into the big pool with the rest of us today and she wasn’t screaming, so that’s a good sign. I didn’t try to put her under the water again or have her get the wall, because I felt like one trauma event for the weekend was enough.
Thankfully after swim lessons, we had tickets to see Sesame Street Live. I don’t know who liked it more - Arden or Lily. They both had a great time and danced like maniacs. Lily got a small stuffed Cookie Monster and has been obsessively carrying it around with her since Saturday morning.
Lily’s been a complete trip this weekend, saying some of the funniest stuff I’ve heard her say. She was telling me that at school, she tells Marcus when he’s behaving badly, “Marcus, you BEHAVE! Right now! BEHAVE, MARCUS!” She did this while waving her hand around and pointing her finger (a la Jennifer Yeager). She looked like a mini-version of her teachers and had the tone of voice to match. She also told me tonight that she was going to be a mommy someday and she was going to be exactly like me because I’m so “nice”. It’s so cool that your own kids think you’re awesome because they don’t know what else to compare you to.
My favorite Lily moment was last night, when she refused to eat her dinner. Mike had purchased some yummy poundcake and I told her that she wasn’t getting any unless she ate. She decided to test me, and finished her dinner without eating hardly anything on the plate. Later she came in clutching her belly and told me, “Mama, my tummy is so empty, it hurts.” I told her that she was welcome to have some fruit or cottage cheese or some leftover flank steak. She told me, “My tummy won’t be empty when there’s cake in it . . . ” complete with a devilish smile. I stifled my laughter and told her that there was no cake in her immediate future and she settled for a pear. Ah, the joy of communication . . .
We’ve continued to work on the house little by little, including doing what we always do - spackling every freakin’ hole and repainting. I really hope that the people we are buying from treat their houses the same we we’ve treated ours. Moving into this particular house and cleaning up someone else’s disaster area was not fun, and I can only hope that the sellers won’t be the same. I am aggravating with myself but as Mike said, it’s the right thing to do. It really is.
Tomorrow we’ll head out to the new pool at Wyndham and see if people are friendly or stuck up. Or a combo of both. We’re supposed to tackle the attic tomorrow as well. Good times!
Happy Memorial Day everyone . . .
