Scene: Checking out at WalMart, stuck behind a caravan of friends with 4 kids between them.
Girl #1: Check out my new tattoo, Bobby. Just got it two weeks ago. (lifts tank top above her bra, points to stomach)
Boy #1: Wow, sweet! Is it finished?
Girl #1: No, not yet. The guy wants me to shade it in with black, but I’m thinking about doing a lighter green. See? Like this one. (points to top of right breast, still showing her bra)
Boy #2: Did _____ do your tattoo? Cuz that dude is awesome. When I got my balls pierced, he did ‘em right.
Girl #1: Nope. ______ did the tattoo. _____ pierced me.
Me: said silently, but like a fervent prayer: Please god, please god, please god do not show the girl your pierced scrotum. PLEASE.
Boy #2: Well, if you ever want your ass pierced, he’s the guy to do it.
I need a shower.
Wow..you do have some interesting and weird experiences shopping at your Wal-Mart store. Nothing like that ever happens while I am at our store here on the other side of the river. Maybe you should switch stores.
Ew. I hate WalMart, that’s just one more good reason to not shop there.
Why did you redact the name of the ass-piercer? I’ve been looking for a good ass-piercer for a while now. Can you email me the name?
Ha ha ha ha… oh man that is great stuff. Ass piercing? really? I can’t even imagine.
I’m dying over here! I think I would need a shower after that conversation. Ass piercing and scrotum piercings…OH MY!
WM is the seventh level of hell. Be glad you went to the one in Short Pump, though. If you really want to lose it, try the one in Mechanicsville on a Saturday morning. I had to stop dating someone who shopped there. I couldn’t stand it.