Yesterday, Lily paused dramatically while Mike was putting on her pajamas, grabbed her chest and announced: “I HAVE to PUMP!” Apparently I’ve been hooking myself up to the milking machine too much in front of her, as she is now emulating my phrases like a pro. Mike was cracking up over that comment. I’ve also found, speaking of the pump, that I have to really check it out first before attaching myself to it. It has two settings on it - one for speed and one for the amount of suction. One is a twist knob and the other is a slide lever. Lily LOVES to play with those two settings. Today I was at work and began to pump only scream out in pain - it felt like my eyes were being sucked out through my nipples. Turns out the setting for suction had been turned to “MAX” which would be enough to milk an elephant, and the speed had been set to 10 when it’s normally at 4. The pump sounded like a freight train about to derail and take my poor dairy farm with it.

Everyone keeps asking me how long I’m going to nurse. I don’t know. I try not to think about it. Nursing is keeping me from getting a breast reduction - and when I am asked in my networking group what my burning passion is, I always get the urge to tell them my burning passion is to be a 32A. So far I have resisted. The sooner I am done nursing, the sooner I can begin the long petitioning process with the insurance company. However, I managed nearly 10 months with Lily and I can see the benefits of it . . . not to mention nursing can burn up to 500 calories a day and we all know I need all the caloric burns I can get. So the answer still is, I don’t know. In the meantime I continue to pump on the days Arden is in day care (after checking the pump for Lily alterations) and dream of the day when I can go jogging without pain.

Lily’s doing really well in day care - it’s made my work much easier because I’m not spending the entire day thinking about her crying her eyes out in a corner. The guilt that first week was truly overwhelming. I’m glad we are on the upswing. We are still not sleeping much - Arden wakes up every 3 hours for some reason at night these days. I keep hoping tomorrow will be different. I know this is only temporary and at some point in our lives, we will sleep through the night again.

Today I had a totally non-productive day at work. My computer was infected with 5 (count ‘em, 5) different Trojan Horse viruses that took literally 6 hours to fix, clean and eradicate. It screwed up everything on my computer. I felt like suing Norton Antivirus. I am fanatical about virus and worm protection and I still got hit. Just goes to show you we’re not safe at all. I can’t believe idiots spend time programming these things just to make the rest of us spend our days fixing them. Get a job, you dumb hackers!!!

Seeing Lily in her Flyers cheerleader uniform is hilarious.  It’s even funnier when we can get Lily to jump around and do her “Wiggles” dance in the outfit. Her dance is a sort of frantic hopping/flapping/kicking combo. Very interesting. She needs to practice a bit more before she’s ready to join the Dallas Cowboys. Don’t quit your day job, Lily.

Mike and I got an evening out Saturday and had dinner with two other adults who were also sans children. Amazing! No crayons, coloring, kid’s menus or screaming fits about chicken! It was heavenly and we took our time - 3.5 hours of blissful, uninterrupted dining and chatting. Ahhhh. I got a manicure and pedicure Saturday morning - a gift from Mikey - so by the time the evening rolled around I was feeling positively pampered.

Looks like we’ll be going to Pinehurst in the next couple of weeks to visit Mike’s parents. I’m hopeful Mike can get his dad out of the house and onto the golf course. They both need a break.

Teacher’s Pet . . .

Today I went to Tuckaway to pick up Lily and they were in the middle of music class. I was peering around the corner, trying to get a glimpse of her, and there she was - perched on Ms. Stella’s lap, having her hair stroked and her hands held and clapped in time to the music. All the other kids were on the floor or dancing around - Lily was the only one seated on the human throne. I’m glad they love her, but I should have known she would be the one demanding to be held. She actually went to the potty at Tuckaway which was amazing. I guess the potty training is coming along nicely. They are supposed to go roller skating next week outside, but they recommended Lily not participate since she’s the smallest one in the school and they think she might be smushed. This is coming from the teachers, not the over-protective mama, I swear it.

I’ve been training until just recently, so I’m tired out and fried from looking at the computer screen. Hey, at least I’m working and billing. . . tomorrow is going to be mostly non-billable day, unfortunately.

I’ll post some new pictures of Arden and Lily in the next week or so when dad has time to figure out his digital camera. I might even be able to print some on their new photo printer, which would be exciting - some of the best pictures I have of my monsters are on the digital camera, and I hate not being able to print them out and put into their albums or scrapbooks. That’s the only bummer with digitals . . .

Today I gathered my courage and responsible parenting skills and took Lily to LabCorp for the bloodwork Dr. Derco asked us to have done over a month ago. He thinks that nothing is wrong, and that we shouldn’t worry, but he wants to be certain that nothing else besides her poor appetite is keeping her from growing. I personally hate LabCorp - they aren’t very nice to adults, let alone kids, but today was fine and Lily did wonderfully. Better than me!

I held on to her and my dad held her arm straight out. After the initial stick and about 10 seconds of crying, she chatted (albeit nervously) through the removal of three vials of her blood and even invited the phlebotomist to the mall with us later. Dad said, “You look pale,” and the woman thought he was talking to Lily. When she realized he was talking to me, she started laughing. I wasn’t laughing - I was trying not to combo puke/faint/cry while talking to the back of Lily’s head (she was on my lap). The point of this story is to say that kids do better than adults with things like this - at least the first time, when they don’t know to expect pain or trauma. I wish I could be as good as she is when having my blood drawn. She’s my hero.

We took pictures of her today dressed in the Flyers cheerleader outfit Lois gave her for Christmas - complete with an “on strike” sign above her head. Mom didn’t get the joke, but that’s okay. She’s not much for hockey. For some unknown reason I forgot to get a copy of the photo so I can’t post it here.

Arden and Mike both have runny noses, but seem to be surviving. After a night of listening to him snore his head off (pay back for nine months of hearing my pregnancy snoring), he’ll be sleeping in the guest room tonight. Arden is back to waking up every 3 hours (I thought 3 months was the magic number?!?) and I’m getting back into that hazy, foggy, seriously-sleep-deprived mode. Every night I go to bed and pray for a silent night . . . so far no luck.

At this very moment, Lily is screaming her lungs out in the most pathetic and heartwrenching way. Our pediatrician had told us that when we tried to wean Lily from her pacifier (aka “Nuk” or “Nukkie”), it helps if you cut the tip off because it’s less pleasurable to suck. Well, so much for that theory. Lily wants nothing to do with it and she is totally upset about it. She told us to “put it away” and “git new nukkie”. We’ve been in there twice in less than half hour because she sounds like a crazed animal up there, and now Arden is screaming along with her. Oh, the joyous nature of parenthood. At least Lily is screaming so loud that you can barely hear Arden.

I have to say, even though I know it’s time, it really hurts my heart to take Lily’s comfort away. She loves stuffed animals so hopefully they can totally replace Nuk at some point, but right now I can see why parents cave in, even if you know that it’s best for your child in the long run.

Well, the screaming has finally gotten to me so I’m going up there to see if I can try to comfort her sans nuk. Wish me luck.